hi my name is Anne and I am 21 years old. I know most of the requirements of becoming a surrogate however I am slightly confused with several things Birth Without Complications - I had silent labor. Does that count as an issue?
Healthy - I am a bit over weight and am working on that but is there a specific bmi that a women needs to be at in order to be a surrogate? specificly a gestational surrogate.
Psychological Evaluation - that's where I get confused. Do I as a surrogate pay for that before I find an ip or when I find an ip do they pay for that?
Being married was also a requirement I found at one point. Now if my husband and I get divoriced does that mean I am no longer meeting the requirements?
I know that my best bet is to call a lawyer that works in surrogacy and ask them about this but I was hopign that you would be able to enlighten me a little with this information.
Reply by Rayven You have some great questions here Anne. Let me go through and answer them.
First, I am assuming you are already a mother yourself, are raising your own child, and are not on public assistance. Those are the main qualifications. If you meet those, honestly, most of the others have wiggle room.
A complication of labor is not a type of birth experience. Its a situation which is life threatening to you or the baby. For instance, if you had an emergency c-section that did not go well, where doctors suggested you should not become pregnant again.
As to weight, most surrogates are "fluffy", myself included. There is not a standard BMI. Some clinics are not concerned with BMI at all (mine wasn't). Others want you to be "height/weight proportionate", while some do have BMI perimeters, which vary by clinic. Your best bet is simply to check with the clinic your potential intended parents are working with.
Your IPs will pay for your psychological evaluation (if needed) and any other tests that you need.
Being married is not a requirement. Having a strong support system is, which is usually a spouse but can be a mother, sister, best friend, another surrogate in the area, etc.
You will need to call lawyers in your area. Especially since you are in Washington. It is my understanding (and things change, so please contact an attorney/agency) that it is illegal to be compensated for surrogacy in Washington, meaning you will not be able to receive ANY money in your state if you choose to become a surrogate. It is 100% a gift. Unfortunately, Washington does have laws that state this, while other states have no laws at all, and some states have laws that specifically allow surrogacy.
Thank you!NEW by: Emilyn from Information on Surrogacy
Your post will help other surrogate mothers and intended parents.Thank you for your contribution.Make sure you register on our free surrogacy network so we can follow your journey!
Sep 23, 2011 Rating
Surrogacy Fees by: Anonymous
I am looking in to surrogacy and am finding it to be so unbelievably expensive that we are afraid we are not going to be able to afford it. We have even been looking into surrogacy abroad because we are hoping that it will be a cheaper option for us. Do you know how much the approximate fees are?
Sep 17, 2011 Rating
I know :) by: Rayven from Information on Surrogacy
I know that's what you meant, Anne. Again, just an FYI when you do get together with others, and most surrogates do want to get together when the opportunity arrives.
It sounds like you are a very compassionate person. Surrogacy will be a great fit. There are so many couples out there that dream of an angel like you.
Sep 16, 2011 Rating
continued by: Anne
Well thank you so much for all yoru help. And I do appoligize if anyone reading this has been offended by what I have said. I wasn't meaning noone can get compensated for a surroacy adventure, I was meaning I don't think that's why I would commit myself to that adventure.
Thank you also for taking the time to make this website and answer everyone questions. It's a gread asset and I know that I apperciate it.
Sep 16, 2011 Rating
Compensation by: Rayven from Information on Surrogacy
Anne,
It sounds like your heart is in the right place. I would caution you, however, to not express the opinion that surrogacy is akin to selling one's body to any other surrogate, as it is highly offensive.
Everyone feels differently about compensation. As a 3x surrogate, I personally would never be a surrogate without compensation, unless it was for my own sister. Surrogacy, especially gestational surrogacy, is a lot more than simply being pregnant.
I realize you meant no offense. I'm just putting out a friendly warning should you decide to get together with other surrogates in your region.
Best wishes!
Sep 16, 2011 Rating
following up by: Anne
Thank you so much for that information.
Yes I am a mother of a busy huge 14 month old. When I had him it was a planned c-session. Basic of that story was he was a week late, I was huge, doctor ordered a ultra sound, and he looked to be 10 pounds. Ended up having him the next day and the tech was right. 10 pounds and 20.3 inches long, 14 months later he's 35 pounds.
If I remember correctly, I'll have to look again, in washington state I can receive compecanation only for medical and legal expences. Is it sad that that would be all I would want any ways? I honestly want it to be a gift, but getting compencated. 10 thousand dollars or even 5 thousand seems to me like its still selling your body. Its already expencive, from what I've read, for the intended parents to get a surro pregnant.
