can i be pregnant with my own baby and my friends baby as a surogate

I have a 4 month old son and I know i want another for sure. could i be implanted with my own baby and the baby of a close couple? I would love tp give them that gift but I would want to i guess hit @ birds with one stone> is that selfish?

Reply by Rayven

Though this may sound like the ideal situation for you, in reality, it would never happen. Though it may be medically possible, no clinic in the world would attempt this. Let's examine why:

1. In order to become pregnant in this manner, you would need to go through IVF. This means that you, yourself, would go through a very expensive and very invasive procedure consisting of weeks of injections (which you would give to yourself) followed by a medical procedure in which a large needle would be inserted through your uterus to extract your eggs. Your husband would then to produce sperm, which would be mixed with the extracted eggs in a laboratory setting, and then placed (along with the embryos from your friend) back into you in yet another medical procedure following even more injections.

2. Assuming that the procedure was successful, after giving birth to two babies, both sets of parents would be unable to bond with said children for days, while awaiting DNA paternity testing to see which baby belonged to which parents.

3. What happens if only one baby were to successfully survive the transfer and/or pregnancy? You would have to wait around for days to see which couple would have the baby. Or what if twins were to occur and they only belonged to one couple (the IVF transfer has a high chance of being unsuccessful). What if you were to become pregnant with quadruplets or quintuplets and the doctors said you should reduce to twins? How would you know which baby to abort?

4. Who is going to pay for all this? You're talking tens of thousands of dollars for YOUR IVF treatment (which you don't need otherwise) plus lawyers, plus medical bills, plus pregnancy expenses. And, again, if you were to lose THEIR baby, would they still be responsible for paying for yours?

Though this may have sounded like a good idea to begin with, logistically, it is impossible. It's not selfish; if you are considering helping a friend in this way, that's wonderful. But there is no shortcut in surrogacy; it is an extremely long and emotional process.

And it's not for everyone. Certainly, be done having your own family before you attempt to help another. Anything can happen. Surrogate mothers do (on occasion) give up their own ability to have another child while helping someone else.

Complete your family, and then, if your friend is still in need, consider surrogacy again in the future.

Best wishes!