Husband unsure if surrogacy is the right option, what should I do?

by sandy
(toronto)

ME AND MY HUSBAND HAVE BEEN TRYING FOR YEAR THREW IVF AND NOTHING BUT A EMPTY CRIB :( AND BANK ACCOUNT...IM OK HE HAS A LOW COUNT,,,TOOK ONCE MISCARRIED :( just when we thought we were the happiest ever we were crushed by this....we still have a vial in ice two embryos fertilized...but lost hop started with 21 now my husband has given up all together. and say it dint take till now and it will not,,and he believes thats its what god wants ,,,even thou i know he wants a baby ,,,but when i mention someone carry for us or adoption omg he hits the roof top and changes the subject...i need help what should i do...

Reply by Rayven

Sandy,

It is difficult for me to understand exactly what it is that you are saying.

Your husband needs to be more than 100% on board for you to even think about proceeding with a surrogacy. I would suggest counseling for the two of you to get to the bottom of these issues together.

And if you think you have an empty bank account now, try surrogacy. You'll spend more money on one surrogacy journey than you did in all the previous IVF attempts combined.

Surrogacy is very expensive. What is it that your IVF doctor is recommending?

Also, have you thought about a sperm donor? If the issue lies with your husband, going through Artificial Insemination with a sperm donor might be the best option for you.