While filling out a questionaire for an agency that I'm interested in working with for my first journey a came across a section that askes about my personal religous beliefs. Such as how religous and spiritual am I? What are my religoius beliefs etc. I totally understand the reason behind all of the personal questions and I have no problem being honest. However religion like ones political views always seems to be one of those really sensitive issues for many people. I tend to avoid these topics like the plague because I don't want to offend anyone or sound niave.
So my question is if I'm not a religious person per se, my family does not attend church etc. something tells me this will hit a personal button with many people and they may be immeidiatly turned off. However I don't believe that I should pretend that I'm something I'm not either.
How would you roccommend I approach this sensitive topic without offending potential IPs?
Thanks again for your input, I truly appreciate your time and thoughts:)
Reply by Rayven I completely understand where you are coming from. Religion is one of the questions that in most circumstances, I prefer not to discuss.
But surrogacy is different.
So much in surrogacy has to do with finding the right set of intended parents/surrogate mother to work with. Religion is a big aspect of that. Many intended parents want someone with the same religious beliefs as them. And many intended parents are not involved with religion either.
Put it this way: let's say you were very religious, going to church 2-3 times a week, and your intended parents were not. They might feel uncomfortable with the fact that their baby is "going" to church so much. Or vise versa. If they were religious and you were not, they might feel their child was missing out on important prenatal messages.
(I'm really making this example light; there are more issues, such as religious views on selective reduction and abortion, and other serious stuff.)
You really want to match with a set of parents who feels the same way you do. That's why the questions are there. And since surrogacy is probably the most intimate relationship you will ever have in your life outside your own marriage, it makes sense. You discussed religion with your spouse/significant other, right?
Don't be worried about hitting someone's button. You need to find THE RIGHT intended parents, not just a random set of intended parents. If your religious beliefs or lack thereof are going to turn off a couple, then let them! That's why the question is there! You don't want to work with someone who may be offended by you, just as you wouldn't want to work with someone you are offended by.
Keep in mind that most people in America are not very religious. Both my sets of intended parents were not. In fact, every set I interviewed was not.
If you believe in God but do not attend church, just put down that you are spiritual, but do not attend church. If you are an atheist, say you are not religious, and you'll get matched with intended parents who feel the same.
And honestly, it wouldn't hurt to write a sentence or two about the fact that you prefer not to discuss religion. You're trying to be honest here, not make yourself into something you're not. Potential intended parents will appreciate that honestly.
