Surrogacy for my friend.

by Rachael
(Rhode Island, USA)

Hi, I've been thinking about being a surrogate for my friend. She's had three miscarriages and hasn't been able to have any other pregnancies for a couple years now. We don't want to go through an agency, so would my age of 20 still be a problem? And I don't want to charge her, so would the only costs be health insurence and an attorney? Estimating, how much would those be? Thank you.

Reply by Rayven

Hi Rachael,

What a wonderful friend you are for considering becoming a surrogate mother for your friend, and not accepting a fee!

First, on the age thing, that has to do with legal matters, not an agency. You'll need to check with a surrogacy lawyer in your state.

You didn't mention if you have had children yourself. If not, you are not eligible to become her surrogate.

You also didn't say if you were going to be a traditional or gestational surrogate mother. That makes a big difference, financially.

As to costs, even though you are not taking a fee, there are still a lot more costs to consider:

--2 Attorneys (I always recommend both parties have their own attorney, even with a no-fee surrogacy. Others do not fee this way.)
--Legal fees
--Clinic/Procedure Fees
--Travel Expenses
--Medications
--Insurance/Health Care (most surrogates have this, this is a very large fee if you have to pay for it separately)
--Miscellaneous pregnancy related expenses (even though you are not taking a fee, there will be expenses during the pregnancy that you should not have to pay, such as care for your children while going to doctors appointments, maternity clothing, prenatal vitamins, etc)

Again, not sure if you are going traditional, gestational, or gestational with an egg donor. As to an estimate of the costs, you can take off the price of the surrogate fee and the agency, but will need to add back in the health insurance costs, so you maybe save $10-15K.

Best wishes!