What can we legally do to keep our surrogate from leaving?
by Mommy
(Florida)
Our surrogate is 6 months pregnant with our own natural child n CA. She appears to have intentions to leave without us knowing before the baby is born...... she is not getting prenatal care and is non-compliant with the contract... (we have legal contracts for this surrogacy signed by all parties). We have called surrogacy lawyers and missing persons agencies to get help but no one is willing to help us. We are terrified, trying to keep track of her for 6 months now has made our lives a living hell and I am getting physically ill..... We have heard there is nothing we can do until the baby is born, because then it is considered kidnapping!! - but we have also heard there are some laws to prevent her from fleeing Do you know who could help us?
Reply by Rayven
Your situation sounds truly frightening and very upsetting. How is it that you know your surrogate is planning to leave without telling you? Was this a traditional or gestational surrogacy?
And I hate to ask this, but based on your problems with this surrogate, are you positive that:
A: She is really pregnant? B: The baby is really yours?
There have been scams known to happen where a "surrogate" pretends to be pregnant in order to extort cash, or is pregnant with her own child, or is pregnant with one couple's child but is claiming to multiple couples that the child belongs to them. With you being so far away, it can be more difficult to tell if you have been a victim of a scam. Where there any red flags when you met your surrogate in person?
Honestly, there is only one solution to this problem that I can recommend. Take this issue to your surrogacy attorney, the one that wrote your contract and assisted you with contract signing and your pre-birth order.
Comments for
What can we legally do to keep our surrogate from leaving?
We already know that anyone can go to the court and file the pre-birth order that was drawn-up and signed by all parties, and this document also includes the signature of the separate attorney who read and re-explained the PBO to the surrogate before she signed it (and while she had it in her hand). Attorneys typically just send an employee to the clerk at the court house to do this, and at that time the clerk makes an appointment for the attorney to show up in front of a judge a few days later for final judgement. But: the question was, do you know if an actual attorney's presence is required at that judgement date?
Nov 21, 2010 Rating
disappearing surrogate... by: Rayven from Information on Surrogacy
With this additional information, what I can tell you is that you will need to find an attorney that will work with you. This is your only option. It sounds as though the agency has some culpability in this situation as well. Unfortunately, I foresee court battles once the baby is born and DNA confirms you are the biological parents. The most important thing you can do right now is to find an attorney.
If your lawyer was suggesting that you continue to pay your surrogate's compensation, it might have been to not make matters worse. If the compensation was the only thing making your surrogate keep in contact with you, even though she was in breech of contract, taking away that compensation may have made her disappear altogether. You could always sue for breech of contract once your baby is born and in your arms and get a judgment at a later time.
Bottom line: you need a lawyer that will work with you. There is absolutely nothing I can do for you other than to tell you to get legal representation.
Nov 21, 2010 Rating
Filing pre birth without attorney by: Rayven from Information on Surrogacy
I would never, ever ever in any circumstance EVEN A SURROGACY WHERE ONE FAMILY MEMBER HELPS ANOTHER recommend that anything is done without an attorney in surrogacy. Period. This is your child we are talking about. There is nothing more important in all the world. Do it right.
Nov 21, 2010 Rating
pre birth order filing by: Anonymous
we have all the signatures on a pre-birth order drawn up by a legitimate surrogacy attorney. Can we file this ourselves? Do we need an attorney to file this document?
Nov 21, 2010 Rating
disappearing surrogate... by: Anonymous
The surrogate who appears to want to be un-findable is indeed 6 monyhs pregnant and it is a gestational surrogacy. She did go to the Fetal Anatomy Sonogram ( I flew in to LA last month and I saw the baby boy myself). The surrogate appears only in time to get her check each month, pretending to do what is she believes is necessary to get her monthly check, but is still non-compliant regarding most of what the contract specifies on a continuous basis. We fired the attorney who wrote the contract as she was very obviously helping the surrogate, pushing us to pay the surrogate each month while trying to rationalize the non-compliance of the surrogate. We have tried to retain other attorneys but they all claim to know that original attorney and have written to us that they do not like her and will not touch anything having to do with anything she was involved with (she apparently has a very bad reputation). We were lied to by the initial agency owner who introduced us to this surrogate, she hid the surrogates criminal history, marital status, employment status, insurance status...(we let her keep her money and told her to stay away from us and our surrogate). We have information that this original agency has been involved in gettiing babies to couples illegally outside of the country. We have tried calling the FBI, Attorney General's office......everything. No one will help us, they just keep giving us other numbers to call. Please. Help us.
